In desperate search of a Utopia where people can aspire to no lives and no jobs, they’re at it again with the layoffs on a Biblical scale. From the rock-bound craniums of California to the scrambled Gulf Stream of “Who, us?” press releases, jobs are being destroyed.
Note: These cumulative losses aren’t getting reported. If these numbers are anything like accurate, why not?
Silicon Valley has taken the lead, following Meta’s example in cost-cutting. The fact that most of these tinpot outworker street stall businesses aren’t Meta may occur to them one day, but it hasn’t.
We’ll daintily overlook the fact that these structures were put in place by the people now saying they don’t work while making record profits.
We’ll ignore it because everyone else ignores it obsessively. At no point does this mass murder of the workforce reflect on the judgement of employers. At no point will it be asked, “Why is it so easy to tear down the structure that made you profitable in the first place?”
That would be bordering on relevance, which is no longer permitted in respectable financial news. Nyah.
This also helps highly qualified Americans in reassuring them that psychopathic employment policies will make them and their qualifications worthless.
Just to put your minds to rest, this couldn’t possibly have anything to do with the idea that higher unemployment means lower interest rates. It could never be associated with the sacred “hate the employees” ideology. It could have nothing to do with a new level of corporate illiteracy among people who can’t do their own jobs.
It’s all about cutting costs, they say. You know – The costs for which you godlike ignoramuses are directly responsible for existing. The wages you or some other almost-interested infant should be able to cost with simple mental arithmetic.
It might be future planning for completely unknown technological capabilities in advanced artificial intelligence. It might be a 200 year late admission of never having had any idea what employees do.
It’s definitely not about having nobody left to oversight anything. That might interrupt the universal fraud and money laundering. It’s because those pesky employees-critters may reproduce, and then there’d be more of them. So there.
Beautifully timed during massive rises in the cost of living, these layoffs should add much merriment to the good old coast-to-coast mausoleum the US is rapidly becoming. The domino effect through the rest of the economy will be effervescent.
Just think – Somewhere in the Slumdog-like penthouses, some modest genius is helping you to achieve a sort of enlightened poverty you might have otherwise missed. Your feet would not be squishing delightfully through the dunghill of modern employment. You wouldn’t be doing hundreds of futile job applications, either, you deprived person, you.
Better still will be the economic effect of burning out yet another section of Main Street. Just when everyone can’t afford anything, layoffs! Layoffs as bad as the Great Recession! Praise the meds and the reflux and to schmuckward we sail!
Like most people who assume trainloads of money just show up because they want to, American employers seem happy with this cocoon-like view of the world. At no point are the wider consequences of any action discussed.
There’s a reason for that:
You can be competitive with no people to compete for you.
You can be knowledgeable with no people to assess information.
You can be happy with huge empty offices.
Nobody can question your sanity because there will be nobody there.
Your desperate attempts to create a plausible balance sheet won’t come under scrutiny.
This exceptionally high level of imbecility comes from many precedents. You will require an insufferable superiority complex. You need to despite anyone who wasn’t born at least a billionaire.
With this mindset you have a few natural personal advantages.
The chronic inability to find uses for employees.
The refusal to understand information.
That impeccable and verified total genetic lack of managerial talent.
The mental flexibility of a particularly uninspiring piece of cement.
This is why you make such great decisions.
Or, to put it in an interrogative form:
What the hell do you morons think you’re doing?
Who’s advising you, Chicken Little?
Decades of idiotic bad calls and easily avoidable economic catastrophes on Main Street like this are what lost America.
You may have noticed the place looks somehow different. That’s because it’s just not there anymore, is it? It’s still lost. You obviously can’t find it.
Just another disaster in progress. Now, pretend you’ve got a working IQ point between you and fix it.
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Disclaimer
The opinions expressed in this Op-Ed are those of the author. They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of the Digital Journal or its members.
