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Op-Ed: The dead hate Net Neutrality? The FCC agrees with them

In what must surely be one of the tackiest of tacky ploys, someone has been using the names of dead people to submit fake information to the FCC. After all this is only actual communication, so the Federal Communications Commission has been only too happy to accept that information. Fake or not, it’s OK down the rabbit hole and presumably through the looking glass.
Meanwhile, real submissions supporting Net Neutrality were considered spam. Makes sense, doesn’t it? Everybody hates removal of Net Neutrality, but non-existent dead people want it removed, so you remove it. You cuddly-wuddly little dears, you. You, your competence, and your integrity are now fully defined.
Let’s clarify:
1. Nobody had any problems with Net Neutrality.
2. US ISP business was fine, thanks so much for asking.
3. There were no operational or commercial issues at all.
4. Therefore, the FCC had to create a problem where there was no problem.
Yet again, the theory of some sort of commercial advantage outweighs the facts:
1. If ISPs start going slow or acting weird, there’ll be a stampede to more efficient services.
2. No access to websites because someone doesn’t like them, ditto.
3. Failure to provide services may lead to legal liabilities and heavy damages to ISPs which don’t deliver on their contracts.
4. There is no such thing as a “selective” ISP contract in which the provider claims the right to not deliver access to websites. It’s an automatic breach of contract, commercial norms, and common law for service providers if there’s no contract.
What’s really surprising is the FCC’s apparent ignorance of commercial realities. Who wants an ISP that doesn’t do things on a selective basis?
Politics vs the internet – No contest
The buffoons behind this typical “all for us” idiocy should note :
• If you’re looking for an online Vietnam, you’ve found it. The average high school kid could route anything around this Fool’s Paradise of Selective Services. So could all of America’s enemies. This is dumber than dumb; it’s built-in network suicide.
• If you’re looking for a way for foreign ISPs to completely outclass US ISPs, you’ve found it. Any weirdness with services means dump that service provider, and even your idiot evolutionary-challenged chimp advisors should know that.
• If you’re looking for class actions against your no doubt dripping-with-wisdom online shills, you’ve found it. There’s more grounds here than in all the coffee in percolators in North America, and perhaps the world.
The United States does not need yet another politically driven form of obsolescence and anti-competitive imbecility. Only in the deepest recesses of the backside of oblivion would you find such a totally fecal idea as revoking Net Neutrality. This is madness, and it’s madness that’s doomed to fail apocalyptically.
Learn something for a change – The net is bigger than you are. It can hit back, and hit back hard. There’s a sort of karmic honesty in using the dead to express your ridiculous views – You’ll soon be joining them, legally and commercially.

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Editor-at-Large based in Sydney, Australia.

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