Athlete John Henry Clark chatted about his new book “Cancer Diaries.”
How did your new book “Cancer Diaries” come about?
When I got a phone call way back in 1999, I guess it was, telling me that my mother had “a mass on her brain,” the first thing I did after hanging up the phone was head straight back to my cluttered little office at home and start writing. Putting my thoughts down on paper. It was the only thing I could think to do in that moment. That little essay I wrote that night became the eulogy I read at her memorial service.
My background is journalism and I have always expressed myself better with the written word than with the spoken word. So when I got my own cancer diagnosis on April 7, 2023, one way I dealt with this shocking, terrifying, life-changing news was the same way I dealt with my mother’s illness – to write about it. I started keeping a journal on my laptop.
I wrote something in the journal every day, and although I was hesitant at first to let a lot of people know what was going on with me, I eventually started posting a few things on social media, as well.
When my chemotherapy treatments earlier this year in January and February turned out to be 100-percent successful, I decided it was time to put everything together and tell my story.
One thing I learned over the years in journalism is that if I have a question about something, there is somebody somewhere who has the same question. Dealing with a cancer diagnosis is such a confusing, frightening, and sometimes lonely ordeal, that I wanted to share my experiences in hopes of giving readers some information and insight that might help them make their journey easier in some way.
Was it a cathartic process for you to write?
It is always cathartic for me to write, and “Cancer Diaries” certainly falls into that category. Like I said, writing is the way I express myself, sort out my feelings, and just basically get things off my chest.
Honestly, I was not thinking “book” until my treatments turned out to be successful, and scans and blood work showed no more cancer. I knew then that I had to try and put something together. That was nearly a year ago now.
What did this book teach you about yourself?
I think it was two months after my diagnosis – maybe one month – that I attended the funeral service for a friend’s wife. I made all the proper greetings and then went and sat by myself near the back row, and I tell you what, you can probably imagine the thoughts running through my head during that service.
A few months after that, I covered a cancer survivor’s celebration for the newspaper (I’m a freelancer) and that was another experience that hit close to home. Several people spoke about their cancer journey, and one woman named Donna, a longtime survivor, said: “We don’t know how strong we are until being strong is the only choice we have.”
I certainly learned that I am stronger than I think, and I truly believe that God gave me the strength to deal with everything, and to make some important decisions that I think led to my successful outcome.
Eight months after my treatments, I traveled to the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage in Spain to meet some friends for a 200-mile hike through the mountains. Having cancer really threw me off the rails, and I wanted not only to test myself physically after being weakened by my treatments, but I also needed something to help me re-start my life again.
When I was first diagnosed, one of the things I felt immediately was cut off from the rest of the world. I felt different. Like I did not belong anymore with the “normal” people. I was defective.
It was a huge emotional rollercoaster and I pretty much retreated from life for a while. Hiking the Camino Primitivo was really difficult but also satisfying to accomplish. After we finished, I went and stayed for a week at a friend’s home in A Coruña, on the northwestern coast, and one day we were riding the bus downtown for dinner.
Most of the time, the city buses are pretty crowded, but this time there were only a few people on board and I was sitting across the aisle from my friend, Tom. It was dusk and A Coruña is on the ocean, and as I was looking out the window, I saw all the city lights reflecting off the water.
It was really pretty and it occurred to me in that moment that this world is a beautiful place, and I needed to appreciate and enjoy my life more.
Stop worrying so much about, what if? Stop focusing on the negative so much. Stop taking the days for granted. The idea of living life “one day at a time” took on new meaning.
How was it different from “Finally Fit”?
Interesting question. Writing “Cancer Diaries” was a lot like “Finally Fit,” I think.
I have also written books about depression, anxiety, addiction, and I developed sort of a formula in which I tell my story and alternate the narrative with research to support points in the narrative, if that makes sense.
“Finally Fit” tells the story of me turning my life around when my friend from childhood, Bubba Sparks, and I got together via Facebook and he started teaching me how to pole vault. This was around the time of my 60th birthday and I was stuck in a serious doldrums, sort of similar to what happened a few years later.
Of course, “Cancer Diaries” deals with a different issue, but it also is a story of overcoming what seems at times like insurmountable odds, having faith, believing in yourself, and winning.
Were there any moments in your life or career that have helped define you?
One of the defining moments in my life was quitting sports when I was 15 years old. Growing up, I played sports all year round – baseball, basketball, football, track – and when I quit everything one after the other, I suddenly had no identity. I used to be a “jock,” but no more.
Our high school (Bubba and I went to the same school) had certain cliques and I no longer fit in anywhere. Long story short, that led to my making some lousy decisions just to fit in somewhere, and that is one reason learning to pole vault was such an important thing for me.
After losing my identity as an athlete when I was a stupid teenager – a decision that was one of my biggest regrets in life – I was an athlete again.
What’s it like knowing and working with Doug “Bubba” Sparks?
Bubba is a great friend. For us to have reconnected by chance the way we did had to have involved some kind of divine intervention.
When he moved back to Texas from California, we rode together every Sunday morning to Kris Allison’s place in New Braunfels to practice pole vault. I was way overweight and way out of shape, and I pulled and/or tore pretty much every muscle from the waist down during those first few months.
But it was great. Like I said, I was an athlete again. Along with being a great friend, Bubba is a great coach. No matter what happened at practice, he always found one positive thing to take away from a session. I will never forget my first practice there in New Braunfels. As we were wrapping things up and I thought we were finished
for the day, Bubba says, “OK, now before we go, you’re gonna jump over your first bar.”
He set the crossbar at four feet, and I stood there on the runway and said, “Do I have to use a pole, or can I just run and jump over it?” Seemed kind of silly to me. Four feet? Seriously? ‘You have to use a pole,” Bubba said, so I took my grip, ran probably about two or three lefts, and cleared the bar.
Guess what? It was exciting as heck! I was walking on air as we crossed the parking lot, got in the car, and headed home.
When I went to the Texas Senior Games in 2018, my first competition jump was also
memorable.
I was pushing the pole then, instead of carrying it, and when they called my name, I found my mark, found my grip, took a deep breath, and took off running. Somehow, I managed to miss the box completely, with my pole jamming into the left side of the pit and me sprawling awkwardly in the same direction.
There were lots of people sitting around watching, and fortunately I did not hear anyone laughing as I got up and turned around. I walked over to where Bubba was sitting and he smiled, “Try it again.” I tried again and this time, cleared my first competition bar.
There were several other Masters vaulters who also trained in New Braunfels on Sunday mornings, and all of them were qualified for the National Senior Games the following year.
I had not come close to the qualifying height, but I wanted to join in the fun and go to Albuquerque with the gang, so I decided to enter the Oklahoma Senior Games in six months.
Bubba had already qualified, so I asked him if he would go to Oklahoma and coach me. He did and by that time, I was jumping nearly two feet higher, and I qualified for the 2019 Nationals.
That is where the story begins in “Finally Fit,” with me standing on the runway in Albuquerque, getting ready for my first jump, marveling at my surroundings.
What do your plans for the future include?
Right now, I’m pretty focused on promoting “Cancer Diaries.” I consider this my most important book, and I really want it to go far and help lots of people. I believe I went through what I went through for a reason, and that reason is to inspire and support people going through the same things I went through.
I have been slowly working myself back into shape, and plan to get back on the runway soon and start training for the Texas Senior Games in March. I plan to qualify for Nationals in Iowa this summer.
What does the word success mean to you?
Success to me is waking up in the morning feeling good inside for no reason. Not because you accomplished some goal or got a big promotion at work or finished that New York Times crossword puzzle, but just simply because you are happy to be alive.
It also means having the freedom to do whatever you want, whenever you want. Money is not the key to success. It is the freedom that money can bring that is the real prize.
What’s the one thing you want our readers to get out of this book?
This book is written obviously for people diagnosed with cancer, but also for those who care about them. Family, friends, acquaintances, co-workers, neighbors.
Facing cancer can be a lonely and confusing time. You want to know people care about you, but you don’t want people to feel sorry for you. You want sympathy and concern, but you don’t want anybody to know about your condition.
On the flip side, people around the patient don’t always know what to say or do, so often they don’t do anything. Let’s face it, nobody wants to think about cancer. Nobody wants to be reminded that cancer is not something that happens only to other people. It seems like pretty much everyone is affected by this nasty disease in some way.
I talk about that a lot in “Cancer Diaries,” and what folks can do to support the patient and let them know people care and they’re not alone.
Release date for the book is January 28th on Amazon. During the initial promotion, copies will be available for 99 cents. The idea is to generate enough sales and reviews for Amazon’s algorithm to take notice and get “Cancer Diaries” on top of the heap when people go searching for a book.
Be aware that the initial release will be digital (Kindle) only. However, that does not mean a Kindle device is required to buy the book. On the book listings page, there is a free Kindle app that allows you to download any and all books to your heart’s content on a phone, tablet, laptop, any device.
After that initial promo period, the paperback and hardcover versions will be available, as well.
His book “Cancer Diaries” is available on Amazon by clicking here.
To learn more about John Henry Clark and his books, check out his official website.
