Madrid (dpa) – Spaniards have been wondering about it for years, but now the question has finally been posed: Is the famed sexual prowess of the “Latin lover” really nothing but a myth?
“If we compared ourselves with the lovers we see in the movies, advertisements or let alone porno films, we would be in for a shock,” the daily El Mundo warned recently.
The sexy reputation of Spaniards and other Latin people stems from legendary figures such as Don Juan and Giacomo Casanova, and has recently been reinforced by Hispanic Hollywood sex symbols such as Antonio Banderas, Jennifer Lopez or Penelope Cruz.
Yet the cold reality behind the bedroom curtains is, that “Spaniards only make love rarely – less than twice a week – and poorly – 75 per cent of the males cannot keep it going for more than two minutes,” El Mundo announced gloomily.
International polls have consistently rated Spaniards as being among Europe´s worst lovers, and the Spanish press has anxiously sought to remedy the problem by offering advice on how to improve the performance in bed.
Few people have dared to question the reliability of the polls, let alone the premise that we should all be daily having hours of explosive sex after working for the whole day, doing piles of household chores and putting the kids to bed.
Worrying about sex is far from being just a Spanish problem, and in fact sex in Western societies is being spoiled by the constant flow of media images of perfect bodies engaged in passionate love- making, experts say.
“People worry that their partners notice their fat or cellulite and become incapable of enjoying sex,” sexologist Hernan Cancio said.
Women become depressed about not resembling Sharon Stone in the film Basic Instinct, while men fret about penis size and about their capacity to satisfy their partners.
People have become so anxious that the duration of the “hot” sexual period in the beginning of a relationship has been shortened from several years to an average of six months, psychology professor Garcia Vega said.
“Urban man has become less potent, not only in sex, but in human relations in general,” said Remigio Petrelli who markets sexual stimulants.
In Spain, 19 per cent of males aged from 25 to 70 years are having potency problems, according to one study.
The media gives the mistaken impression that we are not living fully unless we are constantly experiencing moments of sexual ecstasy, experts say.
Many men think that their sex lives amount to nothing unless they have slept with hundreds of women, and some people try to keep their sex lives intense with ever more unusual sexual acts while others have affairs behind the backs of their partners.
Stress wears the fun out of sex, too many explicit images wear the mystery out of it, and some experts believe that there is less and less enjoyment of sex in sex-obsessed Western societies although nobody seems willing to admit it.
Incredible as it may seem, sex may even have been more fun in the former rural societies where people had not even heard of “sexual liberation” but where they were not ceaselessly comparing themselves with impossible models, according to some sexologists.
Experts do not encourage us to give up sexual fantasies, just to take them less seriously and to use them as stimuli rather than as models to live up to.
Some people need it five times a day, others once a month, and either is fine. “The only criterion is your own satisfaction,” El Mundo advised.
