Top 10 Sex-Happy cities
The magazine ranked 100 American cities on a host of criteria. Acknowledging that “without surveillance equipment it’s impossible to know precisely how much sex people are having” it found other ways, chiefly to look at data on birth rates in each city, condom sales, sex toy sales and the rates of infection of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).
It wasn’t explicit on how much weight categories were given, or how the rate of STDs played into their figures, but hey, to rank 100 cities for their amount of sex had to include a lot of before-playing with numbers.
Sorry about the pun.
Right — here are your Top Ten most sex-happy cities in the U.S., according to Men’s Health magazine: 1) Austin, Texas ; 2) Dallas, Texas; 3) Columbus, Ohio; 4) Durham S.C. (really?); 5) Denver, CO; 6) Indianapolis, IN; 7) Arlington, Texas; 8) Oklahoma City, OK; 9) Bakersfield, CA and 10) Houston, Texas.
Notice there are no less than four cites from Texas in that top ten, Austin, Dallas, Arlington and Houston. What gives with Texas? Who’d ‘a thunk it? Where’s sexually liberated Californians, other than Bakersfield they don’t make it. Wouldn’t you think maybe Seattle or Portland would be up there? What about Florida — none.
Bottom of the sex barrel
There’s surely not a city in America that wouldn’t want to be ranked high for sex and their city. Houston only ranked tenth — maybe quite good given all the cities surveyed — but a local daily, the Houston Chronicle, made sure to do a story boasting about it.
It seems there’s really no way, if this survey can be believed, to know what the outward demeanor of a city is that is having lots of sex. Or not having lots, for that matter. With that in mind here then is the bottom ten, the rear of the rankings, cities that could become the butt of sex jokes, with their inhabitants made to feel like asses.
Sorry about the buns — puns!
Sex-Happy cities ranked 91 through 100: 91) Billings, Montana (makes sense somehow); 92) Reno, NV; 93) Buffalo, N.Y.; 94) Hartford. CT (another reason not to go there); 95) St. Petersburg, Florida (but doesn’t Tiger Woods live there?); 96) Manchester, NH; 97) Charleston, W.V.; 98) Yonkers, N.Y. (great name though!); 99) Burlington, VT; 100) Portland, ME (wrong Portland).
The nice thing about appearing in the bottom 10 is that, in this case, having your work cut out for you in order to catch up is a good thing.
