"Bloody ink on my pad spelled suicide. Michael Jackson even passed cause you scrutinized..." Harlem Hip-Hop artist A$AP raps over a chilling Danger Mouse Beat in the song "Phoenix, off his long awaited debut album, "LongLiveA$AP."
The album is set to be officially released Tuesday January 15.
"Bloody ink on my pad spelled suicide . Kurt Cobain even died cause you scrutinized," Rocky raps about the Nirvana frontman who committed suicide in 1994.
The song "Phoenix" reflects on artists, either established, or just starting out, who needed an escape, either from drugs or a gunshot. The pressure was just too much. In a recent interview with MTV News, A$AP Rocky admitted he's had his own very depressing thoughts, and that this song is "really personal" to him for many reasons.
"Those are all natural feelings that we all get sometimes. You hurt so bad and you're going through so much pain to the point where sometimes you don't wanna live anymore," the rapper told MTV News. "That's how a lot of people think, whether we'd like to admit it or not and that's all I was showcasing. It was that emotion.....suicidal kinda emotions."
A$AP Rocky certainly isn't alone in these feelings. In 2011, Chicago rapper Lupe Fiasco admitted to suffering from suicidal thoughts. He explained how stressed and alone he felt that it brought him to the point of feeling like he actually wanted to commit "suicide." His song "Beautiful Lasers" off his album Lasers is dedicated to that emotion. The message he most wanted to get out there, however, was that in the end, he loves music so much, it's worth all that stress. "My life is music," he said.
Sadly, some artists and professionals within the music industry haven't been as lucky as A$AP Rocky and Lupe. For some, there is no relief. The believe the only escape is death. In August, 2012, Violator CEO and manager to some of the world's most popular Hip-Hop stars was found dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. Some of the artists Chris managed through the years gave a very special tribute performance in honor of their fallen friend at the 2012 BET Hip-Hop Awards.
On Christmas Eve, Brooklyn rapper Capital Steez, real name Jamal Dewar, a member of rap group Pro-Era, committed suicide after the writing "the end" on his Twitter page. He was 19. And earlier this week, Seattle police announced that rapper Freddy E, real name Frederick E. Buhl, died Saturday January 5 of an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head, He was 22.
A$AP looks at these tragedies and says sometimes putting one's "dark thoughts" onto paper can be "therapeutic," MTV News reports.
"Sometimes I have suicidal thoughts. And maybe I should seek help, or maybe it's not that deep," he said.