It all began with the creation of a few rumors about Swift going on a date with One Direction singer Harry Styles. And then came the photographs.
And finally — all at once — the fan girls showed up, ready to eliminate anyone who dared compete for the love and affection of the wonderful Mr. Styles.
Mathers, whose best friend even includes the “1D” tag in her Twitter handle, added some input of her own.
“If @taylorswift13 is really dating the love of my life,” she wrote
, “I will not be happy.”
But this remark, it seems, did not suffice when Mathers eventually accepted that reality that the couple was, in fact, dating.
“Dear @taylorswift13, please stop whoring around with every guy you see,” she continued
three minutes later. “We all know you're only doing it so you can make another album.”
It took another 40 minutes before Mathers figured out how to properly apply the greatest all of puns to her feed.
“I, am never, ever, everrrrr, listening to your music againnnn @taylorswift13,” she wrote
with excitement. “LIKE EVER.”
Swift has yet to respond. But, seeing as her tweets typically consist of gummy worms and other minutiae, it's doubtful she ever will.