A 'sideways' review of the latest goings-on in Coronation Street, the popular British Soap Opera.
This post looks at episodes broadcast in the UK 19th - 23rd November 2012.
*Warning: May Contain Spoilers*
Nick and Leanne are together; Curse-ty's falling apart; Sophie's falling in love and have the scales finally fallen from Tyrone's eyes?
Yes … yes … YES!
No, not David and Kylie making babies, but the joy of seeing Tyrone hear Curse-ty threaten Fiz. Who didn't have a delicious feeling of relief as the credits rolled on Friday night and for Ty to – AT LAST – believe her?
The reason why people like Curse-ty get away with murder (literally, sometimes) is that they're just so convincing. How many con artists have we seen in Soaps over the years, and it's only their complete and utter credibility that enables them to pull the wool over everyone's eyes.
Corrie always do this so well, and you've got to hand it to Natalie Gumede for her marvellous portrayal of Curse-ty. A Soap villain only really works if the actor playing them is believable, and she makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up every time she gets 'that look' on her face.
Her line, "Angie now, is it?" was truly scary, as was her face appearing at the door of the playgroup. I can't believe she had the nerve to rant at Ty with, "I'm packing knickers in a sweatshop and you're having a bit of fun with the yummy mummies," though.
Er, SHE was the one who'd pretty much forced the poor chap into giving up work in the first place because she was moaning about being stuck in the house all day. Make your mind up, love. You can't have it both ways!
Still, that's all water under the bridge now, as Tyrone's got proof that it's not just him who's in danger, but Fiz too. Curse-ty threw a vase against the wall on Wednesday (it was a pretty horrible one though, so we'll let her off!), but Tyrone HAS to think of the baby now. How long before she gets injured by flying pots – or worse? What will he do though? Ooh, roll on Monday!
Sophie's feeling her way
Jenna's making the hairs stand up on the back of Sophie's neck, isn't she? There's flirting-a-plenty going on there, and it's definitely a 'two-way street'. Jenna's face confirmed that when Sophie (deliberately) mentioned Sian.
Casually mentioning the name of an ex partner is just about the only way a gay woman can hint to another woman about her sexuality – other than talking about her relationships in non-specific terms by not mentioning the word 'he' or 'him'.
Mandy telling Lloyd that Jenna wouldn't be interested in Kevin (because 'She's a career girl') was another clue. Ooh, Sally already dislikes Jenna; she's going to go right off the deep end when this one gets going!
What a drip
Speaking of water: Kirk? Isle of Wight? Oh, come on. This was a storyline so far-fetched that I doubt even EastEnders would have run it.
Would they seriously have us believe that Kirk set off to Preston (about 30 miles), not realise that he'd instead driven to the South coast (about 240 miles), bought a ticket and actually got onto a ferry and then missed the ferry back again?
With it being Beth's birthday and her dropping loads of hints about how she'd wanted to just spend one 'happy' birthday with a man, I'd just assumed that when Kirk rang her to say that he'd missed the ferry he was going to suddenly walk into the Rovers all dressed up and ready to whisk her away for a lovely night out somewhere as a huge surprise, but no …
That was a very rare – and very silly – storyline, and not one you'd expect of the brilliant Coronation Street writing team.
Any Port in a storm
The other big (and VERY exciting) storyline this week was Leanne and Nick's engagement. You only have to look at Leanne to know her heart's not in it, don't you? Even her cardigan gave us a hint. It had boats on it. Peter's on a boat …
Despite it not looking like that (to me) when they were dating, it would now seem that Eva actually does love Nick 'for himself', so when Leanne gets back with Peter I guess we're all hoping that Eva will be there to pick up the pieces and for Nick to realise that the perfect woman for him was right there under his nose the whole time? I'd certainly like that to happen. Eva deserves some happiness.
After being SO spoiled over the last fortnight, there's not quite so many Grins of the Week for us this week!
Beth (about Michelle): "She's 'ard as flint, that one."
David: "Morning Maria. How's your gay boyfriend?"
Maria: "Leave it out, Kylie."
Kylie: "Ooh, someone's in a bad mood. You not 'getting any'? Try not shaving your legs … or grow a moustache?"
Maria: "You're pathetic, do you know that?"
Kylie: "Hey. I'm not the one who split up a gay couple so she could turn one straight. SO Jeremy Kyle."
Maria: "Says the cage dancer who sold her own kid."
Beth (when Eva walked in, dressed to kill): "It's a factory love – not the Oscars."
David (about the engagement party) : "I might be busy. I'll have to check my diary."
Maria: "You haven't got a diary."
David: "How do you know?"
Maria: "You can't write, can you?"
Lewis: "Ever heard the expression 'Give a dog a bad name'?"
Kylie: "Know it? It's on my family Coat of Arms, mate!"
* Notice Eva's little finger when they were all cackling-on about Rob? Dead funny! (Hey, is that a backless dress she's got on – with a black bra clearly visible across her back? Is that the fashion?)
* Wasn't Rob a wimp over Fiz's accident?! He's a bloke. Blokes are meant to get straight in and take charge in a crisis, aren't they?
* When Eva asked Nick if she could have a glass of wine on Monday he didn't ask her whether she wanted red or white.
* Anyone notice the new Liam this week? I thought he looked different, and when he said his line without looking at the camera I checked the credits and – sure enough – it's a different little boy. He's a right little cutie too!
* Kevin nearly went to Sally's for a nightcap, "With Jack being away". Jack being away? He's a baby, not Richard Branson. Babies don't 'go away'. Where's he gone to, anyway? It must be a long trip; we haven't seen him for months.
* That 'tache suits David. Very Errol Flynn.
* There's no way that Kylie would have been able to swig from that bottle without anyone noticing. Peoples' eyes are always looking around, and if you were in the Bistro you couldn't have failed to glance up if you'd been facing in that direction and caught someone's arm go up in the air in your field of vision.
* Audrey was so sweet when she clasped her hands together in sheer joy at the engagement party.
* AS if Curse-ty would had replied "Yes, I did it," to Rob and the Police when they asked her if she'd flicked the switch!
* Leanne's got her Winter/Christmas coat out. It's nice to see her wearing the same coat. Most people in 'real life' get their Winter wardrobe out at this time of the year, so why not Soap characters too?!
* Michelle looked stunning again this week. Black really suits her. Who else wears almost nothing but black? Umm? Yes, you all know who. Only a couple of weeks to go now …