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article imageOp-Ed: A question about Ann Romney's 'mommy skills'

By Bill Schmalfeldt     Apr 16, 2012 in Politics
I would be the last person to criticize Ann Romney for choosing to be a stay-at-home mom... which was never really the thing she was being criticized for. But I do have some questions.
When I was hired by the federal government back in 2005, my wife was suffering from untreated scleroderma. She would have likely died from pulmonary hypertension by now had I not landed this government position at the GS-12 level, making myself able... for the first time... to afford the kind of health insurance she needed. And even then, to have a government benefits contract, a health insurance provider had to agree to overlook pre-existing conditions. So her scleroderma was stabilized and I received serious treatment for my burgeoning Parkinson's disease.
I credit this insurance for saving her life then, and even more recently when she underwent surgery for Stage I throat cancer that we caught very, very early. (See, even though I had to retire because of my Parkinson's disease, I get to keep the insurance.)
All that being said, when I landed that job back in 2005, I was making enough money by myself that I felt justified in telling Gail that she didn't need to work outside the house any more. Both of the kids were fully grown. Gail took care of the dogs and the majority of the house stuff. So I am the last person to say that a stay at home mom is not "working."
But still, I have some questions about Ann Romney's "Mommy" skills. So, Ann? If you're reading this?
What in God's name were you thinking when you let your husband take your beautiful Irish Setter, Seamus, stuff him into a doggie carrier and tie him to the top of the car for a long car trip? What in the name of all that is holy did you think was going to happen? Were you surprised when some miles down the road, the terrified dog's feces began to stain your back window? Were you shocked when, according to reports, your dog bolted and was never seen again when he was freed from the cage?
Let me tell you something. My wife has long suspected that deep down inside, I am an idiot. I have given her some occasions in the past to form that opinion. But most of the time, she suffers in silence and allows me to learn (in as much as I am capable of learning) from my mistakes.
But you know what? If I were ever to grab a doggie carrier and stuff either of my doggies into it (Raven, our 7 year old Border Collie and Shiloh, our little German Shepherd girl who will be six on the 24th of this month) and then made a move to tie the carrier with the dog in it to the top of the car, even just to drive down to the damn mailbox, my wife would call me names that in my 57-years of life I have never been called... and I was in the Navy for nearly nine of those years. And my wife is not college educated like you, Ann! She is a simple Wisconsin girl who learned what she learned in the school of life. We are both common people with simple ways -- I believe folks like you would consider us "the hoi polloi." Therefore, I can attest without fear of contradiction, Gail knows some really DIRTY words. I would have heard them all! Deservedly so!
She would use language that would make your pretty blonde hair curl, Ann! She would tell me, in no uncertain terms, to take the damn dog off the top of the car! "What are you, an idiot?" she would ask me with that, "My God, what am I married to" look on her face and that would have been BEFORE I had the brain surgery for my Parkinson's disease. (Now that I can't drive any more, the dogs are quite safe.)
Ann? Your SONS were with you. Why in God's name did you allow your idiot husband to strap your beautiful, trusting, loving dog to the top of the car like that? What did you THINK was going to happen? Did you think that Seamus would just enjoy the wind blowing through his cage at 65-70 miles an hour? (You Canadian readers, figure the kilometers per hour yourselves.)
Were you AFRAID of your husband? Was he the kind of man to give you the back of his hand when you questioned his authority as head of the family? Or was he just the "stern father" type who would give you "that look" and then not talk to you for several hours for daring to question his will?
WHAT KIND OF MOTHER ALLOWS HER SONS' LOVING, BEAUTIFUL DOG TO BE TIED TO THE TOP OF A CAR IN A DOGGIE CARRIER TO BE SHUTTLED DOWN THE HIGHWAY AT TOP HIGHWAY SPEEDS FOR, WHAT? A 500-MILE TRIP?
(Canadians? Do the calc.)
THAT is MY problem with your "Mommy Skills," Ann. I have no idea if you cut the crusts off your sons' peanut butter and jelly sandwiches or wrote little notes to pack in their private school lunches, or whether you had a servant to do that for you. I do know you sat there and did nothing... NOTHIING... when your idiot husband tied a DOG to the top of your car and DROVE DOWN THE ROAD!!!
And THAT is why I could never stomach the idea of you being the "First Lady of the United States."
This opinion article was written by an independent writer. The opinions and views expressed herein are those of the author and are not necessarily intended to reflect those of DigitalJournal.com
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