The wives of two errant men, Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Edwards, have been ridiculed for standing by their men. Bill Clinton and John Edwards had affairs. Their wives have forgiven them. Then why have so many people ridiculed them?
The marriage vows say until death about parting. They also talk about love and support. Fidelity is written in the contract by an unwritten affirmation. Still the notion of marriage is relationship. What we learn from those who forgive is the quality of mercy, which is supposed to be at the core of family values and Christian beliefs. Yet it is often those who express an evangelical bent who are the first to condemn women who stay in the marriage in spite of infidelity.
That condemnation, interestingly enough, seems mostly to surround high-profile Democrats. Where was the condemnation about Newt Gingrich who had an affair with his secretary while fighting for the impeachment of Clinton while folks made fun of Hillary for standing by her man? Where were the condemnations about David Vitter’s wife, he a Republican, when he visited prostitutes? Liberals may have put down Vitter, but his wife escaped ridicule. Why are the wives of men who fall from grace, by their infidelities, held up for ridicule? Why are they made humorous targets when their actions simply reveal that they believe in keeping their promises, and they have strength and moral integrity to forgive and show mercy.
Strength and mercy among the faithful should certainly be supported. What the experiences of these women really show they know the value of a long-term relationship that means more than a casual affair. With an
infidelity lifetime rate among males over 60 at 28% , should 28% of those wives seek divorce? /
I salute these women for real grace under fire, for courage of their convictions, for loyalty when everyone makes fun of it, and for showing mercy that somehow many people do not believe in when it comes to relationships. If we are talking family values, the real value to the family is the contract itself. Certainly extra-marital sex or infidelity breaks the contract at some level. On the other hand, the major thrust of the contract allows for serious setbacks and states that partners will keep it nonetheless. These women have decided, as others have as well, to stay with their husbands and honor their investment in a relationship that they hope will be life-long.
