Op-Ed: Narcissism: Too much praise dangerous for kids

Are the psychotic monsters in the office and business created by praise? Could be, if a British expert is right. “Boosting self esteem” is creating middle aged brats, thanks to psychological techniques being misused by amateurs.

Dr Carol Craig has a few things to say about the “Yes, darling” methods of education, and none of them are good. The BBC reports:

She said an obsession with boosting children's self-esteem was encouraging a narcissistic generation who focused on themselves and felt "entitled".

"Narcissists make terrible relationship partners, parents and employees. It's not a positive characteristic. We are in danger of encouraging this," she said.

"And we are kidding ourselves if we think that we aren't going to undermine learning if we restrict criticism.

Sounds like a review of a media management meeting, doesn’t it? No great surprise where these celebrity vermin come from, either. These are the kids who are rewarded regardless of their shortcomings. Like Wall Street, if they run over someone, they get a clean new car, not a lawsuit. I grew up with kids like these. Some were actually insane, some were insane when it translated into Tantrum Subsidies. Praise is supposed to be used like vitamin supplements: To deal with deficiencies. Severe loss of self esteem is a known obvious cause of suicides, particularly with the global culture of bullying now prevalent. The other side of the coin is the well known, and universally despised, egocentric jerk. Decades of being the recipient of nothing but praise has made them unable to comprehend criticism. Being surrounded by sycophants does nothing for personal perspective except to give a fatal overrating of oneself. There’s another element here. The egocentrics are also the bullies. The privileged brat as a bully is nothing new. In come cases, calling them narcissists hardly describes them. These highly praised scum really come into their own in the workplace. Protected by privilege, their lack of substance is no obstacle to making life a misery for others. Nor do they see any reason why they shouldn’t. They’re above criticism, as far as they know. The miracle is that fewer of them are shot than might be expected. Dr. Craig wants teachers to stop trying to be psychologists. She’s hoping for parental responsibility, too, but let’s face it, concepts like that aren’t exactly top of anyone’s agenda. She’s talking to an ignoramus society which has just got its head around the idea that paying religious school teachers to sexually molest children might be wrong. This isn’t the culture for common sense. A better approach might be the idea that having a narcissist child might be grounds for criticism of parents. People don’t seem to mind being stupid, but they do object to looking stupid. It’s a matter of opinion who are the kids. But it’s nice to know some form of rational thought is finally percolating through to the social culture of education. It’s about 40 years overdue, but the fact that this idea is even being mentioned is encouraging.