Op-Ed: Rihanna, Battered and Bruised Yet Somehow to Blame?

A recent poll of Boston area teens revealed that almost half of those surveyed believe Rihanna is responsible for the beating her boyfriend, Chris Brown, allegedly gave her. A woman is bloodied and bruised, and somehow our kids believe she is at fault.

Unlike many who have involved themselves by writing, commenting or airing a show on the Chris Brown/Rihanna saga, I do not claim to be an "expert" in domestic abuse or battery. I go by my gut, and my gut tells me that a man does not have the right to repeatedly hit a woman to the point that she has swollen and bruised lips, contusions on both sides of her forehead and bruises and lacerations all over her face and body, all while her alleged attacker had no significant injuries and fled the scene after the attack. Even if she was the one who started it; even if she was the one who allegedly threw the first punch; even if she questioned or mocked his manhood, his Mamma, or his sexual prowess. And I am not the only one who believes this. In his own words, when interviewed last December by Power 105, Chris Brown said that when he and Rihanna fight, he does the responsible thing and walks away.

Nah, we don’t be fighting like that. I laugh stuff off and walk away. I do the grown man.

According to an affidavit and search warrant issued by the State of California, Rihanna and Chris Brown got into a verbal spat over a text message sent by an ex-girlfriend of Brown's. It is alleged that Brown pulled the car over, stopped by a curb and tried to shove Rihanna out the door. Allegedly, Rihanna was wearing a seat belt and that is what stopped her from being dumped out of the car to the ground by her boyfriend of a year-and-a-half. When he couldn't shove her out of the car, it is alleged that Brown bounced Rihanna's head off the window, punched her in the face and started driving away. He continued to punch her in the face with his right hand while driving with his left, til her mouth filled with blood and with each subsequent blow, blood spattered all over Rihanna's clothes and all over the car. It is alleged that at some point Rihanna "bent over at the waist placing her elbows and face near her lap in an attempt to protect" herself from the punishing blows. Shortly after the incident, Chris Brown changed his relationship status on Facebook to "Single" and then wrote the following update: "You'll begin to see her true colors. Believe it!", insinuating in the worst kind of way that the alleged assault that left his girlfriend battered, bruised and bitten, and him with no significant injuries was somehow her responsibility. There are more gory details at the link above, and the allegations run the gamut from Rihanna being put in a head lock, having her cartoid arteries squeezed until she started losing consciousness, being bitten on the ears, arms and fingers, and being punched by Brown, basically from head to toe. In the face of all this, somehow according to those Boston teen's between the ages of 12 and 19, it was all her fault. It is no wonder when they listen to crap from pop-tarts who manufacture number one singles by singing "Hit Me Baby ... One More Time"; and according to their idol (Brown) who basically says she started it and deserved what she got; and according to a a major make up manufacturer, Revlon, who hires a mega polling firm to run an online survey asking people if they'd be less likely to buy their rivals (Cover Girl) products because Rihanna is their spokesperson. Smear the victim, keep repeating the lie and eventually, people believe it to be true. The survey showed (well to me, anyway) some horrifying facts about kids attitudes towards domestic violence today: 46 percent believe that Rihanna was to blame, 52 percent believe the media has treated Brown unfairly, 44 percent said that fighting was a normal part of an intimate partner relationship, and "a significant number" think that Rihanna is trying to destroy Chris Brown's music career. As if. And now, there are rumors that the couple have reunited or are thinking of trying to make it work. Hopefully the next time she won't be found crumpled in a little ball on the side of a road somewhere in Hollywood, battered to within an inch of her life, or worse. How sad.