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Op-Ed: A Dino-size Problem Gives Little Texans a Huge Headache

By Sandy Sand     Jan 31, 2009 in Politics
It’s not like Texas state legislators don’t have big problems to deal with like the recession, shortfalls in tax revenue, paying for hurricane damage and other pressing matters, that a mistaken identity of a dinosaur doesn’t loom large.
Who would have, could have ever have dreamed that an animal that’s been dead for 112 million years would come back to haunt arrogant Texas state legislators to drop everything else in favor of changing the state’s dinosaur from the look-alike interloper from the East Coast to the real one from the South?
Beyond that, who would have thought there would even be such a thing as a state dino?
Paul J. Weber, writing for the Associated Press, summed it up the best.
“Pleurocoelus has served ably as the official dinosaur of Texas. Sure, it was a plant-noshing herbivore in a fiercely barbecue-proud state, but the sauropod dwarfed most other dinos and lumbered with a 20-ton swagger.
Then he was exposed as an East Coaster.”
Oh, the shame of it all!
The discovery in 2007 of the imposter’s infiltration into Texas lore led a Fort Worth lawmaker to file a resolution the will send the pesky pretender, pleurocoelus, packing for parts unknown.
He will be replaced by the newly discovered paluxysaurus jonesi, named for the Paluxy River in central Texas, where he was dug up by a graduate student and found to be the real Texas native.
Aaron Pan, curator of science for the Fort Worth Museum of Science and History, thinks its of the utmost importance, too, saying something like if it doesn’t walk and squawk like a duck you can’t call it that.
Both pleurocoelus and paluxysaurus were four-footed, giraffe-necked herbivores of enormous proportions.
Enormous being a perfect fit for Texans who presumptuously and pretentiously think they are the biggest and best of all things. Not even after the bigger, better and more geographically diverse Alaska was added to the lower 48 were Texans persuaded that they are second best.
Scheduled to come up for a vote soon, it’s almost guaranteed that the measure will pass without any problem.
No problem, that is, except for pleurocoelus who will lose his crown as king of the dinosaur hill in the Lone Star State, never to shine again.
But wait. There maybe hope yet for ol' pleury.
A native of Maryland, perhaps that state’s legislators will give a him a seat of honor as their king of the dinos.
Unless, that is, they are busy taking care of more important things.
This opinion article was written by an independent writer. The opinions and views expressed herein are those of the author and are not necessarily intended to reflect those of
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