World's First Testicle Cookbook: Cross Your Legs and Pray

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According to news sources, a Serbian chef named Ljubomir Erovic, has published the world's first testicle recipe book aptly entitled: “Cooking With Balls.” The book includes the author’s favorite selections, “Testicle Pizza” and “Battered Testicles.” Currently available as an e-book, a handy dandy video guide showing the chef peeling the skin off testicles and slicing them up into chunks is included! (Just in case you haven’t lost your appetite already!)

The book contains cordon bleu recipes, such as calf testicles in wine and testicles with bourgignon sauce. The chef also reveals the ingredients or his testicle pizza recipe, which includes cheese, onion, pepper, bacon and…bull’s testicles. This recipe was heretofore a family secret known only to the bull (who sacrificed much in this case). He had this to say of the recipe and his book:

“It's Italian pizza with Serbian balls. The tastiest testicles in my opinion come from bulls, stallions or ostriches, although other people have their own favorites. "All testicles can be eaten - except human, of course."

The 45-year-old chef is self-taught in the art of testicle cuisine, but his 20 years of "cooking with balls" or “mountain oysters” as they are sometimes referred to, make him a world authority in the field. This may be considered a dubious honor for some who prefer the more traditional teachings of Emeril or Martha Stewart, but for others it just may seem that the man is just like the title of his book.

I hope I don’t have to explain. (Ask someone if you aren't sure.)

Testicles are rich in testosterone (Surprise, surprise!) and are believed by many to have powerful aphrodisiac qualities.

If you buy this book I do hope you enjoy it, but please, whatever you do, don’t

INVITE ME OVER FOR DINNER!