A Sex Toy a Day Keeps the Doctor Away?

Earlier this week, the Supreme Court declined to hear a 9 year old case challenging Alabama's ban on the sale of sex toys. I declare Alabama no fun at all! They must be the new rest home state.

Slate reports that the state law prohibits the distribution of "any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs for anything of pecuniary value." However, the law does make exceptions for "a bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial, or law enforcement purpose." What medical purposes do sex toys serve? Well, they can strengthen muscles. Women who suffer from incontinence or a prolapsed uterus can exercise their pubococcygeal muscles and have great orgasms at the same time. Apparently the muscles get an even better workout if you use things like weighted barbells, balls, and spring-loaded devices. It's not just women either. Men with prostate disorders might use a dildo to massage themselves and drain the built-up fluid. (Although some doctors believe this can be dangerous.) Some in the health profession believe that a woman can hasten recovery from surgeries like Caesarean sections with the help of sex toys, because they increase blood flow. Sex toys can also improve sexual function for people with certain conditions. Diabetes and multiple sclerosis affect nerve transmission. That can dull sexual sensation. Medications for high blood pressure and depression can have side effects that limit sexual response. What about women with hormonal changes due to menopause or who suffer nerve damage after surgery and sometimes find their clitorises to be less sensitive? A sex toy just might be necessary to increase arousal. So you see, the sex toy is our friend. No need to fear. Alabama is the drooling sleeping old fart on the couch just south of "fun". There is always a medical need for an orgasm.

For men, doctors might recommend a penis pump, though it's possible to buy one without a prescription. For women, there are devices like the Eros, which is basically a pump for the clitoris. The handheld device features a small cup that pulses and sucks to enhance blood flow to the clitoris; more blood flow in the area increases arousal, which in turn helps the body lubricate itself and makes sex more pleasurable.

Vibrators were actually invented as medical equipment to treat female hysteria and other pelvic disorders. There, that makes it legal. Haha Alabama. People can still get off.