The Smile of Sadness

I was not blind. She was smiling. I was not dreaming. But her eyes... there was something about them -- hidden pain. The smile on her face could not cover up the sadness in her eyes. It was unexplainable. I have never seen that kind of look in anyone’s eyes. Later on, I found out that she was HIV positive, had tuberculosis and only three years old. These were the words of my friend who visited Uganda recently. Unfortunately, his heart-wrenching reflection about his meeting with this little girl is not the first reflection I have heard in the past couple of months -- there were many. “What is your name?” asked my friend and all he could hear is silence. Silence so deep that he could not take it. He sat beside this little girl for an hour just looking at her, not uttering a word. She looked at him with her beautiful, big, brown eyes and just smiled. Later on, he found out that she did not eat for 9 days. If you are asking me where her family is, her mother and father were shot, their bodies thrown in a ditch. Her sister was HIV positive and was on her death bed. She died a couple of weeks later. The sad reality which people might or might not be aware is that a child dies every 30 seconds in the world and yet we are still ignoring this by going to wars or wasting money on silly things instead of helping these children grow up and have a future. Many of these children want to become doctors and lawyers. They are not in any way different from any other child out there. They all have the same goals and same dreams, except they lack what we all take for granted. I have taken many things for granted during my childhood. But, I am sure many other people would say the same. We still take our fresh water and food for granted. Our children become spoiled as they pick and choose what to eat or drink.

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But reality of these children is that they do not have fresh water. Their parents or they travel for miles and miles to bring water to their homes. And guess what? The water they bring is not clean. It cannot be compared to clean water. To help you picture this, think of yourself taking a glass of water. Now, put about 5 spoons of sand, dirt, and waste in it and mix it up. Watch the sand swirl and the water become dark. Now, try to picture yourself drinking that – that is what they drink every day, wash their clothing in, cook their food in. It is hard to picture this so if you cannot picture it, it is understandable. If you are wondering if I have ever been to Africa, my answer to you is no, I have never seen these children. However, similar situation rings close to home. I remember waiting in line for 4 hours to get sugar in my country. Think about how many times per day you use sugar. Many… I also remember being without water when power was off for days. We had to fill up buckets and buckets of water to have it until power is back on. The truth is I have never experienced anything remotely close to what these children go through every day, but yet I feel attached to them. Another astonishing reality about the world is that people would watch documentaries about poverty and they would shrug their shoulders, say “Oh, poor children,” shake their heads, and then continue what they were doing. I have heard many people say: “If it doesn’t affect me that means it doesn’t matter.” The other month I have heard a person say that African children have deserved what they have gotten – classical statement of class logic – “You always get what you deserve, and you always deserve what you get.” The thing that these people do not understand is that these children never asked to be in this kind of situation in the first place and they have done nothing to deserve the life they are living. They have never asked to be born with HIV, or get tuberculosis, or not have clean water, or get taken away from their home to be turned into child soldiers, or shoot their parents, or see their parents being killed. About two months ago, a little girl, also three years old, was wrapped in a carpet and burned. 80% of her body was covered in burns. LRA or Lord’s Resistance Army was responsible for this. Now, I ask a question to everyone who goes by the class logic: if you think these children deserved what they have gotten, how on earth did this little girl, this fragile child deserve this? What did she do to deserve it? You probably cannot even answer this question. Thankfully, this little girl is in recovery. But how many children out there went through the same devastating thing and did not recover? Unfortunately, many. More than you think. So, next time you see a documentary on TV or hear a story about children in the world, stop, listen, light up a candle for them, donate some money that you were planning to spend on shopping anyway or make yourself aware of the world’s biggest tragedy – the poverty of children of the world.

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If you are passing by a homeless child, do not just pass by. Stop, look at them, ask them if they need help, offer to buy them lunch, anything! Anything you do will not be taken for granted that is for certain. I have stated previously that my friend and I have decided to fund raise all of the money needed for our trip to this beautiful but devastating country which we plan to go to next year. I am not making this trip just to look at these children, but to help as much as I can. I did not say that I am ready to deal with this and come face-to-face with suffering: how can anyone be ready for that? You cannot prepare yourself for what you might see or might not see out there. The most important thing for me is to receive a smile here and there from these children whom I consider my heroes. After that, my heart will be in the right place.