The Secret to Meeting Great Singles and it's not via the Internet

We live in an world of Internet savvy, dating enthusiasts who portray themselves as a perfect soul mate. However, after the first face to face meeting, the game is up and singles are left with a sense of letdown. Let's revisit old-fashioned dating.

If you turn on the computer, flip on the TV or hop in your car to listen to some tunes from your favorite radio station, it won't be long before you will hear an ad about the marvels of Internet dating. Find the love of your life with a little help from Neil Clark Warren and Eharmony.com. Check out match.com, myspace or hook up with someone through one of many game sites like World of Warcraft or City of Heroes. None of these Internet sources are bad in and of themselves and in fact there are many marriages that started though an internet conversation. Most of these websites were created with the best intentions and have security measures in place to try and weed out the creeps that use the safety of a computer to mess with your mind. The problem is that they all revolve around us interacting with others in a world that can be easily manipulated. My profile on digitaljournal says that I am a girl and that my birthday is on July 17th. Those facts happen to be true, but I could just as easily have duped you and the system and you'd be reading an article written by an ugly old fat guy or a skinny one for that matter. (This is an illustration, not a commentary on a particular kind of man, so no nasty emails) The point is that we need to go back to the basics. What ever happened to meeting someone through friends at a party, or running into someone at the park while you wait for Fido to do his business? What about church? No, I am not suggesting that church be used as a singles networking event, but some nice people, who happen to be single, go to church; first to worship and second to fellowship. Have you thought about getting involved in your local chamber or signing up with an organization like Young Active Professionals . Have you thought about giving back to the community with programs like Little League, Big Brother and Big Sisters or Habitat for Humanity. I once heard a Denton, TX preacher instruct young singles to get out and run the race of life and while you're running, look to your left and your right and see who is running the race beside you. Take a second look, maybe your are running beside your future mate. Am I suggesting you to take up skydiving when the thought of jumping out of an airplane makes your blood run cold? No. Why try to run with adrenaline-filled, stunt junkies when wine tasting is more your cup of tea? If you love books, join a book club; if fitness is your thing, ask if you can put up a flyer at your local health club inviting members to meet for a bike hike. (Use common sense and invite a few friends along). Ask your neighbors to be part of a street wide garage sale or a Block party where everyone brings a side to share and their own meat. (or VeggieBob for those Herbivores) Even if there isn't one person who is single on your block or in your book club, you can bet that they know someone who is single and nothing gives a married person more pleasure than hooking up a friend with someone really nice. (that's you) Alright, I have just a couple of more thoughts and then I will leave you to decide whether you are going to be the equivalent of a computer aided couch potato or a participant in real life. Some of you may be thinking, "I'm just not comfortable getting out there and talking to people." "What if they reject me?" "What if I fail?" What if, what if, what if? The easiest way to connect with someone is to take the first step. Smile. Be pleasant, positive, genuine, caring. That in itself will make others stop and take notice. Don't dwell on what you don't have, but on what you do have. Get involved in a group if you're shy. You can still interact with people, but you won't be in the spotlight. Know your worth and choose to care about someone else before you demand they meet your needs. The last piece of encouragement is to take it slow. When you do find someone, talk to them, watch how they treat the elderly, children and animals. Introduce them to family and friends and don't disengage from those who know you just because you are now dating someone. Friends can be a great source of objective reasoning. The hardest piece of advice to hear is abstinence. Getting sexually involved can catapult reason out the window and you can end up being bound to someone that you would never have committed to had you waited and watched. Very few people can keep their true colors from shining through over a long period of time. So, what are you going to do? The choice is yours. I challenge you to take a step of faith. Get up out of your chair, step outside and choose to engage the world around you. You won't be disappointed.